vigilantics | week 3, friday

[Evan does, indeed, open the door. He looks tired, mostly, though if she's perceptive enough she'll be able to tell his eyes are slightly reddened. He tries for a smile, but doesn't quite make it.]

...Hey. How are you, um, holding up?

I'm okay aside from some smoke inhalation.

[ who set the kitchen on fire ]

What about you?

[He opens his mouth, ready to tell the lie that comes fairly easily to him by now - I'll be fine - but something about this week means the words catch in his throat. After a moment and a breath:]

...Not really? I don't, um, I don't know.

You've been through a lot.

[ it's one thing to find a body. it's another to find two bodies, back to back. ]

It's not - not that.

[He doesn't know what exactly it is, but he tries to put it to words after another pause. The next words come out in a jumble.]

We, we talked on Saturday, me and her. After the trial. She was - trying to get better. She said she wasn't going to hurt herself again. She started, started wearing dresses with short sleeves so she could come to terms with it. She was - brave.

[So much braver than him, he thinks.]

This shouldn't have happened. She was... trying to start over.

[ stephanie remembers that reveal during the last trial, and she remembers when monika played the piano for her this week. she saw her arms, but didn't say anything about it. it didn't seem like the right place to point them out. ]

None of this should have happened. She was... really sweet.

I don't understand why, why someone would choose her.

[He can understand some of the victims here. It hurts each time, but knowing that some people have to choose between killing someone here and risk something awful to their worlds, it at least makes sense to him. That only accounts for one murder a week, though.

It seems childish to say, given everything that's happened so far, but—]

It's not fair.

You're right. It's not.

[ that's the confusing part. they already know that the blotters only have to take out one person, so the extra body is... pointless. and as of now, it's impossible for them to know which kill was a blotter kill or not, but that doesn't change the fact that there are people dead for even less of a reason than usual. ]

We'll find who did it.

[He breathes in, and while he doesn't want to be pessimistic...]

There was no evidence. No footprints or strand of hair, nothing moved or changed where we, we found her. It didn't look, look like she fought back. There's nothing to... go from.

There has to be something.

[ then again, that's how it was with dave and hijikata, wasn't it? ]

Like what...?

[It's not chiding or admonishing. He wants to believe they can figure this out somehow, too, so it's an honest question.]

The evidence doesn't have to be where the body was, right? Maybe something that someone else found could have been involved.

[ there was plenty of other places people looked at. ]

[He pauses, but that does, at least, help him feel less hopeless about it.]

...I guess so. There was - a lot in the announcement.

Yeah. And knowing us, it'll take us eight hours to figure anything out, but we'll do it in the end.

...Yeah. And then more people will get killed. That's - great.

[He takes in a breath.]

Sorry, I don't mean to... S-Sorry.

... we have to do the best with what we got here. No matter what, it's going to be a bad situation, but...

[ she looks down at her leg. ]

We still need to try.

...Why?

[He swallows, looking down.]

So some of us can live another week and then more people can get killed?

So that someone who went out there and killed another person doesn't get off freely! The people who died at least deserve to know that we care enough to figure out what happened to them. Anything less is... disrespectful.

[He looks there's something else he wants to say, but he has to think of how to phrase it.]

You're making it sound like, like a good thing, but it's not. It's not. Even the, the people who killed someone here don't deserve to die. They didn't, didn't create this situation.

[ for a second, she actually looks genuinely mad, but the moment passes. ]

I know that. I don't want any of this. But you can't say that there isn't any point because someone else will just die. You need to give every person the attention they deserve, or else they just turn into statistics instead of people.

[He opens his mouth, but then just deflates slightly, shaking his head.]

That's not... what I meant, Steph.

Look. I get that this is all-- bullshit. I know, I really know, everything about this goes against... everything. I don't think voting for someone and executing them is good. But we have to keep moving regardless until we figure out some way to stop all of this.

No, that's - that's not what I meant. I wasn't saying there's not a point in the trials or finding who hurt people, I meant...

[He sighs, frustrated, but the frustration is over his inability to communicate this effectively rather than anything she's said or done. He shakes his head after a moment.]

...It doesn't matter. Sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. I didn't mean to - make you angry.

[he has the emotional intelligence of a rock and i'm sorry steph has to deal with this]

No. Don't-- don't apologize. It's not you, it's me.

[ or both. but it's easier to accept the blame. ]

No, it's - you didn't do anything wrong. Seriously.

[He sounds sincere even if he pauses again, looking towards the ground.]

...But if you want to leave, it's fine.

[He thinks she might want to, but he doesn't want to force her out if that judgment isn't correct. He doesn't sound angry or like he wants her to, at the least.]

I'll only go if you want me to.

[ that's genuine. she got mad, but that's more on her than him; stephanie has a temper, even if she's gotten better at controlling it. ]

[He has trouble articulating what he wants or needs, even if it's simple, so it takes him a moment. All the same...]

I, I don't. Um, I don't want you to, I mean. But - only, only if you want to stay. T-That was probably obvious, but... You know.

Then... I won't leave.

I don't mind.

Okay. You can, um, sit down if you want to.

[He gestures towards the bed, then pauses again. In an effort to clear the air:]

What do you, um, want to talk about...?

[ she feels bad for making it awkward, but she figures that apologizing for it again will just restart the cycle of them trying to claim ownership of the blame. ]

Tell me about... anything.

Anything?

[It takes him a few moments to decide what to talk about. Something good, definitely, because he wants to lighten the mood.]

Last summer I worked as, as an assistant park ranger in one of the state parks back home. It was, um, it was really cool. Sometimes when it wasn't crowded, I'd have time to climb up one of the trees and watch, watch the sky and the sunset.

Where did you live exactly? You mentioned who were close to an orchard before.

[ it sounds like a lot more nature than she's used to. ]

Um, upstate New York. Right near Rochester, if you know where that is.

[He glances towards her.]

How about you?

Gotham. It's in Jersey.

[ APPARENTLY!!! ]

...It's kind of weird to think that we were only, only a state away, huh? I could've driven down to New Jersey in a day if I wanted to.

I know, right? It would be cool if it turned out some of us were actually from the same place, but... I'm pretty sure alternate universe stuff is going on here.

...Yeah, probably. I've never heard of Gotham. What was it like there?

I love it.

... but uh. It's. Special.

[A pause, before he prompts:]

Special...?

week 3, friday

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